He that is me

He that is me

Look at what I have become

With a glazed eye do I stare upon a mirror image brimming with fear of a creation fashioned without care.

Do my eyes bring together therein images of stolen glances, straying behind a heart filled with obscene desires?

Do these dreams fall from an olive leaf, yet far from even hopes phantom?

Is this not I that loved to watch the sun set against a gruesome sky battering away colours before this twinkling stare.

Is this not I who fondly played in the sand barefooted, building castles for the prince to be

Is this not I who had a smile for every occasion and a laugh for every meal…

But look what I have become

A cold face, a hard strand of broken edges of foregone reality

Do my feet scurry these lands aghast of unbridled lust, ravishing the cores of man’s mysterious past

Do I fear now that love’s edges afar; wherein my mind bewilders on life’s begotten

I have defined laws, and a scoffer to splendour abound, an animal scavenging only for survival yet far from prosperity

I have lived with no love in my heart and no home to arrest times unending mockery

I have found it hard to look outside the darkness of night and yonder the rays of dawn…

Alas! Look what I have become

Baseless infamy of rudderless mind cast upon stone carved walls

A wavering soul prodding the night’s edges, of wanton cries behind Credence’s aloft hand

Dis Truth that bares it vicious tooth upon this tragic vice, a harbinger of lives never to be lived?

Do I then cry, tired; An isle faceless, bare and solitary far from that Divine embrace?

I have made my peace with this world and

I will not live only to die

I fear, yet will I die not knowing how to live…

Helas! This image which I see, bears no witness to he that is me

 

Akinola Assayouti